(Issue 55) First Impression

First impression. Is it that important and lasting? I guess it is not if the person doesn't hate you and continue to be friends of yours and try to know you better. However it is also the first impression that determines whether he wants to continue to be friends with you or not.

Lately, I found out that I have two types of first impressions and neither of them are good. When I am not drunk or not clubbing, I am always known as the "ATAS" (not upscale, but the arrogant proud arse), and when I am high in clubs or when I feel the the barrier has been broken, I become the "Club Slut". However haven't they thought that I am a slow ice-breaker and therefore choose to talk to people I am comfortable with. And as for "Club Slut", I guess I am someone who bitches and an open book in terms of my desires, but many doesn't know that I am a talker with not much actions.

I came across this article when I was browsing around and I do find it quite true:

1. Did you know that those who appear to be very strong in heart, are real weaklings and most susceptible?
2. Did you know that those who spend their time protecting others are the ones that really need some one to protect them?
3. Did you know that the three most difficult things to say are : I love you,Sorry and help me. The people who say these are those that actually need them or really feel them, and they are the ones you really need to treasure, because they have said them.
4. Did you know that people who occupy themselves by keeping others company or helping others are the ones that actually need your company and help?
5. Did you know that those who dress in black, are those who want to be unnoticed and need your help and understanding?
6. Did you know that it's easier to say what you feel in writing than saying it to someone in the face? But did you know that it has more value when you say it in the face?
7. Did you know that what is most difficult for you to say or do is much more valuable than anything that is valuable that you can buy with money?

I just feel that many of times I portrait to be strong, confident and open guy, but deep down inside I was hiding something. I realise that only my closest friend knows that I am looking for a stable and long term relation, but everyone else sees me as a heart-breaker from my first impression.

Should I change or should I continue to be myself? Am I letting chances slide by because of my "unhealthy" first impressions? I guess I would continue to be myself and if I grow old and single, at least I have true friends who understands me and I had been living my own life instead of painting a illusion of a perfect guy.

Coming into terms with (hope to be able to exchange love with that special someone out there soon) Me, (enjoys being) Myself and (hates but had accepted the fact that I would be greatly mistaken for the real me) I.

Listening to my dedication to Nete (I hope u don't stand me up anymore): 萧亚轩 - 不远

突然那几秒, 好像天使飞过, 看著你微笑, 那段时间都禁止
远远的注视, 仿佛爱情就该如此, 为所爱的人, 在我心里留一个位置

虽然那前方模糊, 可是想法清清楚楚, 比所有人都渴望你能幸福
我站在你不远处, 默默地为你祝福
把对你的爱藏起来, 放你去寻找追逐
我站在爱的不远处, 不在乎守候多辛苦
当你孤单时想起我, 那是我最大的幸福

对你的期待, 每段都有记载, 每一个眼神, 我都想要收藏起来
不害怕寂寞, 不止一样没人明白, 已经快忘了, 当初迁就在这里等待

虽然那前方模糊, 可是想法清清楚楚, 比所有人都渴望你能幸福
我站在你不远处, 默默地为你祝福,
把对你的爱藏起来, 放你去寻找追逐
我站在爱的不远处, 不在乎守候多辛苦
当你孤单时想起我, 那是我最大的幸福

Translation: At a Near Distant
Looking at your smile, seconds frozed as if there was an appearance of an angel.
At a distant gaze, it is, as if love should be this so, where I reserve a place in my heart for the person I love.

Althought the future is blur, but I am certain of what I want, more than any one else I wish for you to be happy.
Standing near you at a distant place, silently prays blessing for you
(I) lay aside your love, and lets you pursue (your desire)
Standing beside my love (for you), it doesn't matter how tough the wait would be
My greatest blessing is if you think of me when you are alone.

I have recorded my every anticipation for you, and I longed to keep every look from your eyes.
Not afraid of lonieness, it doesn't matter if no one understands why, it is soon forgotten what initially gave in (for me to) wait here for.