Lately when I last returned to Singapore, I realise many guys who are at least 5 years my senior, regardless of sexuality preference, look younger than I am because of their flawless skin, and I am ashamed to say a handful of them are even 10 years seniority. In addition, I had every friend, both new and old, commented that I look like the thirtysomethings but I took it was a 'joke', as if everyone had decided to ganged up on me to bitch about my single yet fabulous life.
The harsh truth only hit me hard, and got my self-esteem paralyse, when everyone start sending me photos of my trip. They looked like scenes I that were to only be taken on my Big "Three Five" birthday. And adding oil to fire, is that all my friends actually looked like the twentysomethings. I realise that instead of enjoying the benefits of being the youngest among most of my friends, I was brought to utterless shame by looking the oldest in every photo.
My dearest friends defended my mellowness due to stress from work and my breakup, however the I am aware that the truth is that my skin are on strike against my "couldn't give a damn" attitude. It is a lesson well-learned lesson with a heavy emotional price to pay, for not paying enough attention to what had once meant most to me.
I regret taking granted of a god-gift and abused it, while the rest of the world is starting to learn the importance of skin care and even more and more straight men are claiming to be Metrosexual. What is the price of beauty? How much should we spend on keeping ourselves well "doll up" without the miracles of makeups and foundations.
Given to the fact that I am gay, should I had spend more attention on looking fabulous always and spend blindly on skincare products to delay the aging of my skin and postponing the age whereby I would require surgical help. Do I need to reach the age of 40 to realise that it is not possible of me to have a natural birth child, with my partner, to worry about his education fees? I guess spending money now to maintain and improve natural beauty would sum up to be lesser than the cost of a surgery to create a miracle.
Is looking good in appearance an evidence to feeling good inside? What makes a man "masculine" with all the beauty products catering to us? Are we strongly influence by footballers, celebrities and models? Is men no longer judge by the amount of wealth he has (and women by her beauty), or do we have to excel in both? Would it ever happen in the near future whereby men starts to carry around their beauty products and touching up in the toilet? What ever it may be in the future, I am not taking anymore chance and going to my improve skin, hopefully to make men weak on their knees, haa (or at least admire my hopefully flawless skin) when I return in July.
Coming to terms with (going to look outside and therefore feel good inside) Me, (willing spending on products to help me look at least my actual age) Myself and (fabulous always inside out) I.
Slapping on Moisturers while dancing to the tune of: Nelly Furtado - Man Eater
And when she walks she walks with passion
When she talks, she talks like she can handle it
When she asks for something boy she means it
Even if you never ever see it
Everybody get your necks to crack around
All you crazy people come on jump around
You doing anything to keep her by your side
Nelly Furtado - Maneater (Jelo's Toronto & George B. Rework)http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ge_83pYd9yE
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